(CURIO BOWS, AND
WITH SACK AND ALL, EXITS LEFT, HURRIEDLY)
BRIDGET (LOOKING
AFTER HIM)
Well, may the Lord
look after you,
And make sure that
you travel true;
And may He speed you
to the sky,
To carry my dear
gifts on high !
(TO HERSELF)
Well, what a
wonderful, strange thing !
Who would have
thought last evening
That I would meet,
just passing here,
A traveller from
heaven's sphere !
(ENTER BRIDGET'S
HUSBAND, TOM, FROM THE FIELDS, RIGHT)
TOM
Well, well, my
Bridget, I must say
That you look
happier today.
Now what on earth
has pleased you so ?
Come, tell me, dear;
I'd like to know.
So don't be shy, I
won't resent it.
You look more
blissful and contented
Than my brown cow
that strayed away
And ate the cabbage
yesterday.
BRIDGET
I've got a message
from the sky.
Oh, Tom, I feel I'm
floating high,
So full of joy,
rejoicing so.
Can you imagine it ?
You know,
It's such a
wonderful, strange thing,
I hardly know where
to begin.
TOM (SUSPICIOUSLY)
Who hit the mark
this time, my dear ?
BRIDGET
How shall I tell
what happened here ?
How tell the wonder
story ? How ?
A scholar wandered
by just now,
A scholar giving
good advice,
Who came here
straight from.......paradise !
Imagine that ! Just
now, today,
From another world,
he came my way.
Not only that, he
knows my old,
Past husband's dear,
departed soul,
(SHE POINTS)
Up in that distant
land, you see.
And he explained to
me that he,
I mean my other man,
you know,
Goes poorer than the
poorest go.
He hasn't even got a
shirt
Or shoes or anything
of worth-
He only owns there
what we gave
When he was given to
the grave.
He has got nothing
there but that:
His winding sheet
and his blue hat.
TOM (WITH GROWING
SUSPICION)
And you, my dear,
saw nothing wrong,
But sent some things
to help along ?
BRIDGET
Oh yes, oh yes,
indeed, oh yes!
How clever, dear, of
you to guess.
I sent a nice, warm
coat for him,
Some good, strong
trousers, tough and trim;
A good, warm shirt
for him to wear,
And good shoes for
his feet up there;
Some golden coins to
buy some beer,
Or was it wine ? I'm
not quite clear-
I sent them all to
my poor dear.
That clever scholar
from the sky
Will take them to
him, by and by,
When he returns to
paradise.
TOM (THINKING
FURIOUSLY)
H'mm....yes, that's
good, that's very nice,
But tell me, which
way did he fly
That blesséd
scholar from the sky
Who took you in, I
mean to say,
Into his confidence;
which way
Did that thieving, I
mean, believing soul,
That one, my dear,
who went and stole-
Who took, that is,
some of our savings,
My hard-earned gold
from my hard slaving;
I mean, the gold and
clothes, you know.....
Just tell me, which
way did he go ?
BRIDGET (POINTING
LEFT)
He went that way, in
greatest haste,
He said he had no
time to waste;
St Peter would be
severe with him
And possibly not let
him in
If he were late for
paradise.
TOM ( GRIMLY)
No doubt it's hard
to get in twice.
I hope his haste was
not so great
That
had time to quite escape-
I mean, I hope
hasn't flown before
I give it to him-
(THUMPS HIS FIST IN
HIS PALM)
er,
give him more;
You see, you didn't
give enough
To right display our
dearest love.
Up there you cannot
live in style
With that much gold
for any while.
I'll take some
further gold to him.
Go, quick, at once,
fast as the wind,
Prepare a horse for
me to ride.
(BRIDGET EXITS
RIGHT)
TOM (TO HIMSELF)
And when I reach our
scholar's side,
My
fist will sanctify his hide,
And my thick boot
will help him fly
A little faster
towards the sky;
Thus he may get to
heaven's door
More quickly than he
bargained for.
(BRIDGET RE-ENTERS)
BRIDGET
Oh Tom, my dear,
just by the way,
Do not take wrongly
what I say,
I hope you're not
upset at all
That I have had this
heavenly call,
And that you don't
misunderstand
My affection for my
other man.
This kindness of
yours I'll repay
When you've gone too
some future day:
When your frame
rests within the ground,
I'll send you
presents, heaven-bound.
TOM (EXPLODING)
Enough ! Our golden
friend may be
Soon out of reach
for you and me !
Go, ready my horse
and hurry now.
(BRIDGET EXITS)
TOM (ALONE)
Oh, what a wife, by
all heavenly power !
There's not her
like, both far and wide,
Throughout the
whole, cursed countryside.
She's probably
unique on earth !
As innocent as at
her birth.
Enough to make a
grown man grieve:
There's not a lie
she'd not believe !
Search where you
will, you will not find
Another of such a
gullible kind.
She falls for any
strolling swindler
With any wild,
chance tale to spin her;
And now, by Peter's
sainted beard,
She's tripped again,
just as I feared !
A wandering scholar
from paradise-
How could she fall
for that device ?
And this professor
from the sky,
Armed only with this
crazy lie,
Has made off with my
precious gold;
I've never known a
thief so bold !
Well, I shall really
make him grieve,
This swindling
spinner of make-believe !
(ANGRILY)
Yes, I shall find
this false divine,
And show him quite
another sign !
I'll ride till I
catch up with him,
And beat him on his
holy skin;
Oh, he'll remember
me, all right,
For many a sore and
sorry night !
And I'll recover
gold and all.
When I get home,
then by St Paul,
I'll teach her to
discern what's true,
I'll teach her to
see clearly, you
Do not believe all
madcap tales.
I'll make her see…
until she wails
Admission of her
crass stupidity !
For otherwise she'll
ruin me.
Why did I wed her
anyway ?
I curse the hour, I
curse the day.
I would have been
much happier
To catch the
creeping plague than her.
(BRIDGET RE-ENTERS)
BRIDGET
The horse is ready
now, my dear.
Be quick ! Be off,
away from here !
Be our good bearer,
briskly-bold,
To take to him some
greater gold.
Fly like a storm,
like a lightning-flash,
And carry him some
further cash !
And all the best of
luck to you;
And may the Lord be
with you too !
TOM
Don't worry dear,
I'll go right now;
And, guided by some
heavenly power,
I'll find him with
the fastest speed !
I'll
help fulfill his greatest need;
I'll seek him out,
I'll be unswerving,
I'll give to him
what he's deserving !
And I shall speed
him on his way
To paradise, without
delay !
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